Relationships
ADVERTIsem*nT
Having a stay-at-home parent can be a great blessing for a family. No need to pay for daycare, the child gets more time to bond with Mom and Dad, and the parent who stays home will likely have time to clean and prepare meals for the family. But this arrangement only works if both parents are on the same page.
Below, you’ll find a story that one father recently shared on Reddit detailing how pressure from his wife to become a single-income family ended up leading to divorce, as well as a conversation with Virginia Gilbert, LMFT.
After having their first child, this man and his partner agreed that both parents would be back at work within a year
Image credits: nebojsa_ki (not the actual photo)
But when his wife decided she never wanted to return to her job, their marriage quickly fell apart
ADVERTIsem*nT
ADVERTIsem*nT
Image credits: LightFieldStudios (not the actual photo)
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Adelaide Ross
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Adelaide Ross
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Howdy, I'm Adelaide! I'm originally from Texas, but after graduating from university with an acting degree, I relocated to sunny Los Angeles for a while. I then got a serious bite from the travel bug and found myself moving to Sweden and England before settling in Lithuania about two years ago. I'm passionate about animal welfare, sustainability and eating delicious food. But as you can see, I cover a wide range of topics including drama, internet trends and hilarious memes. I can easily be won over with a Seinfeld reference, vegan pastry or glass of fresh cold brew. And during my free time, I can usually be seen strolling through a park, playing tennis or baking something tasty.
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Ieva Pečiulytė
Ieva Pečiulytė
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I'm a Visual Editor for Bored Panda. I’m also an analog collage artist. My love for images and experience in layering goes well with both creating collages by hand and working with digital images as an Editor. When I’m not using my kitchen area as an art studio I also do various experiments making my own cosmetics or brewing kombucha. When I’m not at home you would most definitely find me attending a concert or walking my dog.
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Lauren Caswell Lauren Caswell Community Member Follow
Jeezus. Anyone YTAing this needs to stop and think. Yeah maybe she had post partum, etc. But this is flying in the face of what they agreed as a couple. And if she won't compromise, he had a choice to make. Which was his to make, and probably the healthiest choice for him and his ex, in the long run. I'm a solo mum, and SAH by a combo of disability and blood clots costing me internal organs: it's not the dream everyone imagines! It's lonely, boring, lots of time no money, no socialisation. I feel I'm unable to model properly adult behaviour directly for my child by not going to work. It's incredibly hard on the mental health, until you learn ways to compensate for the lacking things. She wouldn't have been happy, on a low income with a burned out and resentful partner. (Edited for spelling and clarification)
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Caro Caro Caro Caro Community Member Follow
Feminism goes both ways. I'm sorry to hear you have health problems Lauren. And long time no see!! Gentle HUGS.
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lenka lenka Community Member Follow
I think the post is either fake or there is much much more to the story. I'm a family lawyer. I agree with the first reply - judges don't give 50/50 custody for babies. This is not consistent best interests of attachment of the child particularly in circ*mstances where one parent has been almost entirely absent.
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Laura Pantazis Laura Pantazis Community Member Follow
I am also a family law attorney. There are many areas where judges award shared custody schedule of 3 days/ 3 days/ 2 days for babies. It isn’t accurate to say that judges don’t award 50/50 custody when in some areas that is the norm - especially if the parents live close to each other.
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Anyone-for-tea? Anyone-for-tea? Community Member Follow
I am cross with myself for believing the clickbait of a title!
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Lauren Caswell Lauren Caswell Community Member Follow
Jeezus. Anyone YTAing this needs to stop and think. Yeah maybe she had post partum, etc. But this is flying in the face of what they agreed as a couple. And if she won't compromise, he had a choice to make. Which was his to make, and probably the healthiest choice for him and his ex, in the long run. I'm a solo mum, and SAH by a combo of disability and blood clots costing me internal organs: it's not the dream everyone imagines! It's lonely, boring, lots of time no money, no socialisation. I feel I'm unable to model properly adult behaviour directly for my child by not going to work. It's incredibly hard on the mental health, until you learn ways to compensate for the lacking things. She wouldn't have been happy, on a low income with a burned out and resentful partner. (Edited for spelling and clarification)
Vote comment up
34points
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reply
Caro Caro Caro Caro Community Member Follow
Feminism goes both ways. I'm sorry to hear you have health problems Lauren. And long time no see!! Gentle HUGS.
Vote comment up
11points
Vote comment down
reply
Load More Replies...
lenka lenka Community Member Follow
I think the post is either fake or there is much much more to the story. I'm a family lawyer. I agree with the first reply - judges don't give 50/50 custody for babies. This is not consistent best interests of attachment of the child particularly in circ*mstances where one parent has been almost entirely absent.
Vote comment up
20points
Vote comment down
reply
Laura Pantazis Laura Pantazis Community Member Follow
I am also a family law attorney. There are many areas where judges award shared custody schedule of 3 days/ 3 days/ 2 days for babies. It isn’t accurate to say that judges don’t award 50/50 custody when in some areas that is the norm - especially if the parents live close to each other.
Vote comment up
13points
Vote comment down
reply
Load More Replies...
Anyone-for-tea? Anyone-for-tea? Community Member Follow
I am cross with myself for believing the clickbait of a title!
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9points
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